Oscars Live Blog!

It's the Academy Awards! I started a little late as I was writing a baseball recap but made a few notes so we're almost right on time. Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin are co-hosting. Neil Patrick Harris introduced them by doing some kind of singing Vegas cabaret act. It was kind of weird and unnecessary but NPH is hilarious so it still worked. And now, let's get to the live stuff...

5:37 - Matt Damon sighting! Way to start the live blog off right ABC.

5:41 - Wow George Clooney. Don't look so thrilled to be there. We're all so sorry that you have to be at the fabulous Oscars wearing a fabulous tuxedo with your gorgeous Italian date.

5:42 - ANOTHER Matt Damon sighting. This is shaping up to be a fantastic Oscars night already.

5:43 - Is George Clooney trying to look funny? Because right now he just looks kind of irritated with them. Overall though, awesome opening.

5:45 - Penelope Cruz's dress is beautiful! She is presenting the award for Best Supporting Actor: Matt Damon for "Invictus", Woody Harrelson for "The Messenger", Christopher Plummer for "The Last Patient", Stanley Tucci for "The Lovely Bones", some guy from "Inglorious Bastards" (sorry I couldn't understand Penelope Cruz's pronunciation of his name). Guess who I'm rooting for.

5:48 - Oh man! Matt Damon did not win. It goes to the guy from Inglorious Bastards. BUT they show Matt Damon in the audience smiling so I'll take that.

5:56 - Wow Cameron Diaz's dress is beautiful too. Very princess-like. She and Steve Carell are presenting Best Animated Movie and they show a video where all of the main characters of each animated movie talk about what it would mean to them to win an Academy Award. It's cute. "Up" wins. I have that movie on my Netflix.

6:00 - Why is Miley Cyrus at the Oscars? Why? Man and unfortunately she is wearing a really pretty dress....aaaaand she just acted like a terrible immature 16 year old. That's the Miley we all know and love. Is it that hard to read off a teleprompter?

6:04 - A song from the movie "Crazy Heart" (which I have never heard of) just won and one of the winners just said he loves his wife more than rainbows.

6:14 - Tina Fey and Robert Downey Jr. do a pretty funny bit on how actors and writers "collaborate". Tina Fey's dress is really pretty but I don't like her hair. "The Hurt Locker" wins Best Original Screenplay.

6:17 - Molly Ringwald? When did she get famous again? Oooh she does not look good. She also appears to be a giant. Either that or Matthew Broderick is not very tall.

6:36 - So for literally this entire time Zoe Saldana and some other girl have been presenting Oscars for short films. Zoe Saldana's dress is awful. It starts out all beaded and sparkly at the top then shades from light purple to medium purple to dark purple and then has giant feathers all around the bottom. Not a fan.

6:38 - Aaaand Ben Stiller is presenting dressed as an Avatar character. James Cameron doesn't look too amused.

6:48 - Rachel McAdams is beautiful and her dress is amazing.

6:54 - I know I shouldn't say it, but I'm going to anyway. Another Matt Damon sighting.

6:55 - Okay and now we are finally getting to some awards I care about. Best Supporting Actress nominations are: Penelope Cruz for "Nine", the woman who plays opposite George Clooney in "Up in the Air", Maggie Gyllenhaal for "Crazy Heart" (her name might have more unnecessary vowels than mine), another actress from "Up in the Air" and Monique for "Precious".

6:59 - Monique wins. Let me tell you. She has classed herself up a lot. I'm really happy she won. Got a couple of goosebumps going. Good for her.

7:09 - Not a fan of Sarah Jessica Parker's outfit. Her hair is a little messy too. You'd think they would have fixed that before she went on to present.

7:18 - Oh good. People from Twilight. Taylor Lautner doesn't bother me so much because he acts like he actually cares. I just feel bad for him because he's 17 or something and all anyone does is talk about his bod.

7:22 - They are showing a horror movie montage and it is gross.

7:29 - John Travolta is nominated for an Academy Award? That has to just mean like in the past he was nominated a few times or something right because I'm pretty sure he wasn't even in a movie this year let alone one that would be up for an Oscar. So once you're nominated once, are you forever called an Academy Award nominee?

7:35 - Do you think it's weird that all the Harry Potter movies have been SO popular but haven't ever really won any Oscars? Let's Wikipedia that. Standby.

7:41 - Okay yes I am correct. Only three of the movies have even been nominated and it's just for artsy stuff, costume design, visual effects, stuff like that. But none have actually won an Oscar. Just struck me as weird.

7:45 - J. Lo looks like a giant Christmas present. And when did she get a semi-ghetto Jenny from the Block accent? She is helping to introduce some kind of dance troupe. This is a little odd but the dancing is very good so I don't mind.

7:55 - Avatar is starting to sneak up there and is winning some awards now as they just won for Best Visual Effects or something. I just don't feel like they're going to win Best Picture though. But I guess we'll see.

8:01 - OMG Matt Damon is presenting. Standby.

8:09 - Hey! Keanu Reeves! What has he been doing the last oh five years? Good to see you buddy!

8:15 - I'm getting bored. I thought these were supposed to be over in like 15 minutes? We still have to do best actor, best actress and best picture.

8:32 - Okay here we go. Best Actor goes to... Jeff Bridges. Not much to say here. He is a pretty classic old-time actor so I think everyone was expecting this to go to him. I'm kind of glad Clooney didn't win because he looked miserable the whole night.

Ha sooo I got on the phone so the live blog kind of came to a screeching halt. This should surprise no one. It was established this weekend that I have a slight tendency towards being a little ADD. But here's what happened:

Sandra Bullock won the Academy Award for Best Actress. I did not see that coming but I am really thrilled for her. That category was stacked with talent, but it's nice to see her break out from the typical roles she usually plays. She's a great actress and I think she's been typecast into playing only goofy chick-flick roles. I have yet to see The Blind Side but I will definitely be Netflixing it.

"The Hurt Locker" won Best Director which is the first female Best Director win in Oscar history. Plus she is James Cameron's ex-wife so that's kind of awesome.

Then "The Hurt Locker" won Best Picture and I was thrilled. Avatar was lame. I'm glad it won all the visual effects awards and the sound awards and all that but it had no real plot and nothing going for it except for the switching from real life to computerized characters.

All in all, it was a good show. We can get rid of all the technical awards and foreign film awards and cut it down to about two hours and I'd be okay with that. Great dresses. Everyone had a very Disney princess at the ball theme going which I am obviously a fan of. Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin did a great job. ABC didn't plug any of their crappy TV shows by using their own people as presenters. Nice work Oscars. See you next year.