2.11.2010

2nd Annual LTD Celebrity Awards

Welcome friends to the 2nd Annual LTD Celebrity Awards. Except it's not really annual is it? Annual means yearly so I guess this means these are the 2nd Weekly LTD Celebrity Awards? I don't know. Do we even like the awards? Let's go anyway.

The News that Made Me Really Excited Award
And the winner is: David Cook for announcing his second album will come out in mid-2010
Accepting this award tonight is David Cook:
Really glad that I could make Amanda's week with the news that I'm releasing my second album this year. Winning American Idol is nothing in comparison to knowing that Amanda is excited about my new album. So thanks.

And now for what I hope is becoming a fan favorite:
The Just Go Away Award
And the winner is: Hailey Glassman and Jon Gosselin for being just about the worst fake celebrities we've seen in a long time
Accepting this award tonight is Hailey Glassman:
First of all, I'd like to thank Steppin Out magazine for making me look super cute on their cover. I'm so honored to be part of such a nationally known and reputable magazine. I'm just really glad that I've been able to tell my stories so no other girls have to go through the pain that I've gone through these last few months. I've just been so hurt you know? I mean I never thought that a father of eight who got famous and rich quick on a reality show and took every sleazy publicity stunt he could to keep his fame including dating me about five minutes after he got divorced would ever hurt me like this. I've done nothing but be so loving and supportive of him -- all of him. I mean when I used to tell him "You would never cheat on me because you're so small" I did that because I loved him. I did that for him. So I just want all the little Hailey Glassmans of the world to know that it's not okay for a guy to leave you after you've berated him for the majority of your relationship and they shouldn't stand for that. Thanks!

The TMI Award
And the winner is: US Magazine for not only running this story but for calling in an expert to actually analyze this
Accepting this award tonight is the person who wrote this terrible article
Wow. Two weeks, two awards. We couldn't be prouder. Once again we're just so glad that we've been able to take such meaningless and frankly a little bit gross information and spin it into an awesome cover story. On behalf of US Magazine, I'd like to thank Khloe Kardashian for Twittering about this subject. We most certainly would not have had this story if it wasn't for her. I'd also like to thank the "board-certified lactation consultant" who lent her expertise to the piece. We think this story sounds so much more credible now, don't you guys? And thanks to Amanda for actually clicking on this link, reading this story, and blogging about it. She proves that as terrible as she might think the story is, we're still able to suck her in with our headlines. Good night!

Best Dressed
And the winner is: Sandra Bullock
No speeches on this one. Here's just a picture of how fabulous she looked this week:


That's all for this week folks! Good night!

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